Her Divorce Was Ugly. Crypto Became a Lifeline

People can pay mortgages in many ways, but as a self-described financial abuse victim once learned in Fort Worth, Texas, a wad of cash taken to a local bank isn’t always a good option.

And that regardless of how many payments have been missed or whether bankruptcy is a risk, said a mother named Karin. Declutter. She asked that her last name not be published due to ongoing legal matters involving her former husband and their four children.

There are anti-money laundering laws to consider if you try to deposit that much money at once, Karin remembered the cashier saying. And to her surprise, there was another problem: She hadn’t been listed as an account owner for at least a decade. Ultimately she was rejected.

“I didn’t have a bank account, which is scary because I’m a middle-class housewife in America,” she said. “It’s a bit like being an invisible person.”

When her decades-old marriage gave way to a contentious divorce, Karin said crypto helped her become financially independent. She felt empowered by a wallet she controlled herself, confident that no one else had access to what was in it.

At some point during her divorce, court documents show that Karin received permission from a judge to use profits from crypto trading to pay her children’s school expenses. Maintaining a familiar environment was important to her. But that was only when she was in danger of being scorned.

Karin said she was instructed to liquidate Bitcoin and Ethereum, which she had moved from an account at a centralized exchange, so it could be fairly distributed. But she refused, arguing that the money was a lifeline. Ultimately, the opposing party and the judge came up with the idea that anyone could verify whether the crypto had been moved using a block explorer, Karin said.

Karin had to teach her own lawyers, the opposing counsel and the judge how to use a blockchain explorer to verify that the money had not been moved.

“I remember thinking, ‘At least I have something,’” she said. “The fact that there were private keys, and only I had the keys, gave me the ability to be so bold and stand up for myself.”

Karin said her marriage paralleled traditional gender roles, with her husband primarily responsible for managing credit cards and bank accounts. When that relationship faltered, she found herself in a difficult situation with little to fall back on.

When she left her ex-husband, her credit cards were maxed out, leaving her with just $56 in available credit. Traditional identity-related systems such as car rentals and hotels rejected her because she did not have a valid credit card. Meanwhile, she had others “pay” the fees with their credit cards and promised to pay them back immediately in stablecoins.

Karin acknowledged that crypto has become male-dominated over time, but she argued that it can serve as a vital tool for marginalized groups precisely because the technology “doesn’t judge” based on gender or age. She recalled receiving advice from pseudonymous characters she met through Crypto Twitter who seemed sympathetic to her situation.

“It wasn’t about all the riches you see on Twitter and on TV,” she said. “It was literally safety and stability for my children.”

Enabling women to directly own digital assets and be treated as the sole beneficiary of funds has proven to impact long-standing social dynamics for marginalized groups, said Paul Wong, director of special projects at the Stellar Development Fund (SDF).

That was the case with an aid distribution system in Ukraine, that SDF developed in collaboration with a UN agency that works for refugees, he said Declutter in December.

“That risk of physical threat is much lower,” Wong said. “If you give universal basic income to a woman, it doesn’t go into a joint account where, historically, a man has used it for purposes other than the family.”

Karin has been working with the National Cryptocurrency Association, or NCA, a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping Americans understand and use crypto. Ripple, the XRP-affiliated fintech, founded the organization and funded it with a two-year $50 million grant.

Rather than promoting a get-rich-quick mentality often attributed to crypto, the organization seeks to capture how a variety of Americans are using crypto in a practical way.

“What really tickles me is any jargon that suggests this is an industry and a technology just for crypto bros,” NCA President and Ripple Chief Legal Officer Stu Alderoty told me. Declutter. “There’s a lot, from FOMO to ‘Wen Lambo?'”

The NCA has tried to highlight practical crypto users, from artists to ranchers. They have Karin categorized as a trader, but she may add another description.

More than twenty years ago, Karin’s ex-husband gave her an ultimatum to choose between marriage and studying law; she chose marriage. After her experience with the legal system, Karin said she has been accepted to law school and will start this fall.